Sunday, September 6, 2015

The loss of Love


So, you’ve never had a girlfriend.

A friend’s friend recently asked me if I was single. To which I said yes. He then proceeded to ask me if I ve never had a girlfriend, which is true. Just as I heard the question, I thought what would be the right thing to say. To satisfy my pride and tell him that I ve never met the right girl, or to blatantly lie or to acknowledge that cupid has never been kind to me.

The question set me thinking as to why we are obsessed with relationships in today’s world. Economics says that where the demand meets the supply, price fixation takes place. In simple terms, a minimum basic requirement to get into a relationship is the price. So when a person considers himself to possess the basic requirements i.e, the price we quote here, he should be sellable on the market. i.e. find a partner. It is when this does not happen that dissatisfaction creeps in. Add to it the hoopla around how one night stands are no big deal, how live-in becoming popular in today’s world and the precious time which seems to pass, establishing the fact that your days are numbered before your days of youth are over. There are three reasons as I see why people want to get into relationships.

Some want love. Find that one person who can make them feel special, feel inflated and satisfy their ego by repeatedly mentioning that you are worth living for.

Others want to fulfill their biological requirements. Maslow says sex is one the most primitive requirements of man and lack of it can do more harm than good. Although humans are capable of satisfying their desires without a partner, yet, the inquisitiveness about the other sex makes people do crazy things far from imagination.

Then there are the third lot. The ones who live for others. Ones who want to boast to others how they have had a satisfying sex life. How they ve slept with people not countable by the number of fingers on their hands. How they are so irresistible that they can have anyone.

It is also possible that people go through all three reasons in different stages of their life. So why would one not be able to get into a relationship despite possessing the threshold ‘price’ here.

There is the hits and misses theory, which says unless you try or keep hitting, there is bleak chance to strike a bull’s eye. So, no attempt to woo someone means no prize.

Then there is also the theory of serendipity. You need to be at the right place at the right time for a prize. You cant get it right with everybody. You just cant have them all.

All said and done, relationships are more a part of the growth process. Just as a child needs to walk in order to run, he needs to have all these varied experiences in order to learn and evolve into a mature human. Yes, you will not get them all, you might not get any, but your learning is going to be true and make you a distinct individual based on your experiences. No wonder not all individuals are the same.

Lets grow and make a fool of ourselves. Aye!